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The experience of the pandemic has inspired people of all ages to make course changes in their lives.
For many, they have emerged from the pandemic with new perspectives related to career, finances, family and other relationships, education, etc. Many folks are recognizing their need for a course correction, requiring a profound shift in consciousness – in the way they think about themselves and how they live their lives.
It’s About You
These folks found their experience of the pandemic as an opportunity to step back, and ask: “What am I going to do with my life?” – in relationship to “me”, my community and the planet.
Course corrections are about consciously inquiring within and trusting the outcomes. Course corrections require wise decisions – decisions based on five important considerations:
1. What is most important to me?
2. What gives me the most satisfaction?
3. When do I experience my greatest rewards?
4. What gives me the most peace of mind, the most joy?
5. How can I be more creative, connect with others, serve my community, empower myself and be “free”?
Course corrections, driven by experiencing pain (mental, physical, emotional, spiritual and psychological), suffering and dissatisfaction, consider new options and risks, new ways of do-ing, be-ing, hav-ing and thinking. Course corrections call for new ways to be bold, insightful, and inventive as we rebuild our lives, from the bottom up, removing faulty structures and foundations. What’s needed is an exploration into our “shadow side,” seeking out root causes of our pain and suffering – beliefs, expectations, assumptions, and paradigms, etc.
The Dilemma Of Change
Many of our lives are driven by fantasy and illusion. If I think this way, or have this or that, or do this or that, then I’ll experience happiness, success and well-being. Many of us have sold our souls through deception, allowing ourselves to be manipulated by fantasy and illusion only to experience frustration at work, failed or failing relationships, burdening debt, physical or mental dis-ease or a lack of well-be-ing.
Taking an inventory is an “inside job.” The “truth” of our lives comes from our heart, our inner wisdom. What seemed logical and “rational” has resulted in pain and suffering – mental, emotional, physical, psychological, financial, social and spiritual.
The dilemma of change is this: change is an opportunity or change is a dead end. We can choose to change or we can resist change. We can change or we can be changed. Life is choices.
It’s Time To Move On
A personal inventory helps one discover that what once caused them deep pain and struggle no longer has merit. Many “necessary” aspects of their lifestyle are no longer relevant, important or even interesting. How about you?
Are you discovering that old attachments (mental, emotional, physical…) no longer have any pull? Are you discovering that objects of your jealousy, envy, anger and grudges no longer have any power over you?
Are you discovering you are no longer inextricably bound to the present and the future, that you are more open to flowing and navigating the present and future with greater ease?
Are you discovering that taking risks is not as threatening as you once thought?
Are you discovering that past answers to problems and challenges no longer work today?
Are you discovering that, synchronistically, your visions and dreams are unfolding according to a Universal plan and not your plan?
We’re All On The Planet – But Why?
After birth, we tend to separate from our True, Real and Authentic Self as we take on a personality and live in a “human” form. We cultivate a relationship with our ego-personality and move away from our soul. The Universal lesson for life on the planet is one of learning and reconnecting to our True and Real “me.”
The Major Obstacle To Change Is – “Me.”
Tapping into our soul-s inner qualities of courage, strength, will, discipline, steadfastness, compassion, and wisdom, we take our personal inventory while overcoming our defensiveness towards change – our fear, anger, rage, negativity, reactivity, confusion, impatience, resentment, and frustration.
One major psycho-emotional obstacle to inventory-taking is our feeling of lack and inadequacy. Striving for perfection, needing to be an “11” on a scale of 1-10, we criticize ourselves, judge ourselves harshly for who we are and aren’t, for what we do and don’t do. We become self-demeaning to save face, to gain sympathy, to garner attention, acknowledgement, and recognition, because we feel “less than.” Still, we resist inventory-taking. As Pogo said, “We have met the enemy. And he is us.”
If It’s To Be, It’s Up To Me.
The greater the separation we have with our True and Real self, the greater we engage in self-limiting, self-sabotaging and self-critical thinking, be-ing, and do-ing. This disconnect results in a misplaced focus on personality rather than on our heart and soul and keeps us from conducting an honest inventory.
The Good News
Each of us has the capacity to conduct a deep personal inventory, from “inside.” We can access our inner wisdom, our higher consciousness and in the process stop belittling ourselves. Touching in to our deeper self, we can bask in greater degrees of self-knowledge, self-love, self-care and self-respect.
The Way In
Some tools that can support our inventory-taking are:
Courage – Stillness, meditation, and connecting with our deep heart build our capacity to confront our “dark side” – limiting beliefs, thoughts, expectations, assumptions, “stories” and self-images.
Honesty – Our inventory requires us to be up-front with ourselves – open, honest, clear and straight when we look ourselves in the mirror. We no longer engage in deceit – of ourselves and others.
Freedom – Unencumbered by illusions and our ego’s needs to be perfect in every way, we are free to be still and call upon our inner wisdom. Focusing on our wisdom body, our energy body and moving away from the dictates of our ego-mind, we experience the lightness and freedom of inventory-taking.
Listening – Related to accessing our inner wisdom, we have to listen to, not just “hear,” the voice within.
We have to allow our inner voice to drive, rather than negate it, fight it, deny it or disengage from it. We must learn to discriminate and be discerning about our inner voice. Silence, quiet, mindfulness and meditation can support us to contact and be comfortable with our inner voice.
What It’s Like To Talk With “Me”
Experiencing an open and honest personal inventory requires me to take time to be with “me.”
To be comfortable conducting a personal inventory requires an open, honest and conscious discriminating between one’s neutral and negative voice. The greatest obstacle preventing an honest inventory is lying to our self. Our inner wisdom is always available to show us the truth about “how I am” and “who I am” but only if we take time to listen. When we listen to our inner voice we engage in the process of creating deeper self-awareness and self-empowerment – “outing” our ego-personality defenses – our “stories,” our self-limiting beliefs, fears, and defensiveness.
By deeply listening, without judgment but with neutrality, self-love and curiosity, we move towards the truth – and uncover what’s underneath our ego-driven behaviors that separate us from our True and Real Self. By deeply listening we recognize what, up to now, has kept us feeling deficient and lacking and increase our capacity to discriminate between our inner voice and our “inner critical voice.”
Our inner voice is a “truth-teller” – a voice that loves us and has our best interests in mind, accepts us just as we are, points to our authentic needs, desires preferences, reveals our inner judge and critic as “inauthentic,” grounds us, soothes us, and gives us the capacity to nurture ourselves in the face of life’s tests and trials. Our inner voice is wrapped in compassion, peace, and self-acceptance – supporting us to hear the truth. Here, we can take our personal inventory from a place of deep knowing – where “right knowing,” “right understanding” and “right action” are made clear.
As we learn to listen and trust our inner voice, we become more open to guidance from within and more trusting of our True and Real Self. Here, we can conduct an open and honest self-inventory and make wise choices, in alignment with our soul’s truth, enabling us to navigate life with greater strength, courage, steadfastness, self-discipline, self-love and wisdom.
Some questions for self-reflection::
- What people, places, events and circumstances do you find uplifting? How so?
- Who or what in your life weighs you down and keeps you from making progress? How so?
- Who or what in your life propels you to take action? How so?
- Do you ever feel you’ve been busier than ever but feel like you’re going nowhere? What accounts for this? How so?
- How much of your life is engaged in “activity” (the illusion of being busy, and doing for the sake of doing) and how much is engaged in “action” (achievement and goal-oriented behavior)?
- Are you investing your time and energy inventing your future? How so?
- Are you waiting for the “right time” to forward the action of your life?
- Are you scurrying around unconsciously trying to maintain a lifestyle or moving consciously to create a life?
- Do your needs to be recognized, to be right, to be loved, to be in control, to be comfortable and to be secure force you to take inappropriate and unnecessary risks? How so?
- Do these needs and resulting behaviors come from your ego or your soul?
(c) 2022, Peter G. Vajda, Ph.D. and True North Partnering. All rights in all media reserved.
I’m grateful for the opportunity to share this reading with you and I hope you find it insightful and useful.
Perhaps you’ll share this with others, post it on a bulletin board, and use it to generate rich and rewarding discussion.
What is the one thing that is keeping you from feeling successful, happy, confident, in control or at peace as you live your life – at work, at home, at play or in relationship? Maybe you know what that “thing” is…maybe you don’t. You just have a feeling that something has to change, whether or not you embrace that change. And how would that change support you to show up as a “better you?”
I’m available to guide you to create relationships that reflect honesty, integrity, authenticity, trust, and respect whether at work or outside of work. I support you to focus on the interpersonal skills that enable you to relate to others with a high level of personal and professional satisfaction – unhampered by personal inconsistencies, beliefs, “stories,” and behaviors that create barriers to a harmonious, pleasant, conscious, compatible, healthy and productive relationship.
I coach by phone, Skype and in person. For more information, 770-804-9125, www.truenorthpartnering.com or pvajda(at)truenorthpartnering.com
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